Tuesday 28 January 2014

Vermin On The High Seas

Rats on a ghost ship we are cruising,
keeping on our toes, no time for snoozing,
we all need to eat but we've got no food in.
Vermin on the high seas.

Watch out World: We're non-stop breeders,
we're out of control and we've got no leaders,
we're nibbling at each other because we're feeders.
Vermin on the high seas.

When we get to land we'll all be manic.
We'll be biting off your hands so you should panic
We're looking for new meat and we're borderline satanic.
Vermin on the high seas.

(Explanation: I have been entertained by the commentary surrounding the whereabouts of the Lyubov Orlova and its 'crew' of rats. Some clever clogs set up a blog for the missing ghost ship.
I wrote this to the tune and rhyme of Irish Rovers' Drunken Sailor.
Inspired by: Where is Lyubov Orlova? & Drunken Sailor .

Update on 27/03/2014: I think they landed in Sweden!

Update on 19/02/2020: The rats are back in the news, still sailing!)

Tuesday 21 January 2014

When Nappies Ruled

Back in time us three flew
to babies crying when nappies ruled.
Transported by awful doses
of streaming eyes and runny noses,
restless sleep and picky eating,
bright red cheeks and non-stop needing.
Three days all told and yet I
feel steam-rolled, knackered and resigned.
How'd you and I muddle through
when babies cried and nappies ruled?

(Explanation: My two children had three days of sickness between them until today. They can do so much themselves now that it was a shock to my system and I can't believe we actually got through the days when one was a newborn and the other a toddler.)